How K-pop Changed My Life (q&a)

It was the fall of 2017. I had reached a point in my life where I was feeling really lost and alone. My best friend on campus had moved back home without a single text or call. Here I was confused out of my mind. Then I found a BTS radio interview randomly one night on YouTube. Upon discovering this entirely new world of K-pop, I vividly remember wishing I had friends to talk to about it or that I had my own K-pop social media pages.

One day I just decided to finally start a K-pop Instagram and I had a little following of about 75 people. I made new friends. Although it was small, it was mine and it brought a tiny bit of happiness into my blurry life. I finally had people to talk to, even if it was just a few, it was somebody.

Months later and thousands of followers later, I still haven't lost that same happiness, that spark that I felt the day I hit 100 followers. I'm so lucky to have the platform I have. Knowing that it started from literally nothing makes me tear up a bit actually. I think I have learned that I truly love creating something I'm passionate about and communicating it to an audience. Before I start answering some of your questions, I want to say thank you for reading this blog. The support and love you have given me over the years have changed my life. Now onto the questions.

The song of the year is without a doubt Fancy by Twice. Someone on Twitter said that Fancy is no longer a song, but rather a lifestyle. And it's so true! Fancy ages like fine-wine. The more I listen to it, the more it just keeps getting better. Boy With Luv will most likely win SOTY at MAMA just because it did so well, but Fancy will always have my heart. No other 2019 song really does compare to it in my opinion. The choreo that goes along with it is every bit of memorable and the song will be played for many years to come. All hail Fancy!

Life is just so confusing right now. I feel like I'm at a crossroads. My dad always told me when I was a kid that life is like a series of waves. Sometimes you're at the top and you feel so happy and motivated and just so sure of who you are. But, then other days you're at the bottom. You just have absolutely no idea what you are doing or who you are. At this point in my life I'm somewhere in between that. I'm trying new things and stepping out of my comfort zone and it's terrifying and strange but I have a feeling something good will come out of it, I'm just not sure what it is at this exact point. But, thank you for asking.

If I could be one K-pop idol for a day I would be Lisa from BLACKPINK. Yes, Lisa is just so cool with everything she does. But, she also is best friends with the love of my life Roseanne Park. So I would get to hangout with Rose for one whole day and I'm not passing that offer up! When I first read this question it was my initial instinct to choose Rose, but I would rather be Lisa so I could hang around Rose instead of being her. I just think I would have a lot of fun being Lisa. I would take a ton of cute photos and actually dance really well, a dream!

I haven't posted a YouTube video in two weeks and if I'm completely honest, it has been very beneficial for me in a lot of ways. But, in other ways, I've felt lost without making videos and like my creativity is becoming blurry. This is by far the longest I've ever gone without posting but I'm sure when I'm ready and feel motivated and inspired again, I'll upload a video. Breaks are amazing things. Sometimes it's so necessary to allow certain parts of yourself to breathe and rest. I haven't addressed it yet but I thought I would answer this question right now. No I'm not quitting, just a simple break is all.

I love this question. I love it because it's so vulnerable. It's no easy to admit that we struggle in our lives. And for you and me both, social situations can make you feel like you're going to die. I would definitely recommend to not spend so much of your time on social media. Communicating on social media trains our brain to get normalized to one certain kind of communication. The kind where you feel comfortable hiding behind the safely of a screen. But I encourage you to challenge that. You'll be amazed at how more confident you are once you put down the phone every once and a while and really try to have a human connection to people in the real world. It's not easy but I wholeheartedly believe you can overcome it. If I can do it, you can too.

The song that threw me into the crazy world of K-pop was DNA by BTS. I remember hearing them preform it at some American award show and I became obsessed. Jimin was the first member I fell for. I loved his blonde hair during that era. Then I listened to Boombayah by BLACKPINK and Red Flavor by Red Velvet. Those were the two girl group songs that go me into girl groups in the first place. I was also super into Big Bang's music. BANG BANG BANG was on repeat for what felt like an eternity.

I'm trying to figure out an answer to this myself. I struggle with being offended and taking things personally everyday of my life. It's a constant battle. I wish that I could be so confident and just live my life freely without ever letting people's opinions get to me, but that's just not the reality of my life. I'm definitely working on this and slowly getting better, but it doesn't happen over night. I think it comes down to remembering that you care about your own life more than anyone else does. Nobody really spends hours and hours thinking about you or the things you did when they go home. Everyone has their own problems and responsibilities to worry about. Also, try to remember that in a few months from now, you won't even think about what's going on in this moment.

I definitely think there will be a day when I no longer listen to or even think about K-pop. But, I will surely never forget the songs and how they changed my life. I actually look forward to when I'm older and I go back to my playlists and play certain K-pop songs. I'm positive they'll take me right back. K-pop is like a lifestyle. There's a lot of pressure in keeping up with what's going on and this and that. So, I'm sure down the line I'll have more important things that need to get done and I won't have time to look on my phone all day. But, K-pop will always hold such an important and special place in my life.

That is all for today's entry. I hope by doing this kind of blog you got to learn more about me as a person. There is so much more to me and to life than K-pop. Although K-pop is a huge part of who I am, it's only one part of many parts.

I'll talk to you all very soon. Thank you for reading. Bye bye!